Hmm...Isn't the alphabet soup missing something?

As I was reading through “An Introduction to Transgender” by Susan Stryker, she provided a list of terms and definitions that were related to the topic of transgender: sex, gender, gender role, gender comportment, intersex, genderqueer, etc. In the midst of these words, there was one word and its meaning that struck me and made me question some things. The “Alphabet soup.” Stryker defines it as a figurative soup containing many acronyms that are used by members of the T section of the LGBTIQQA community which stands for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Intersex, Queer, Questioning, and Allies. I was surprised to read that there were more acronyms that were extended from beyond LGBT which is a pretty common term nowadays. However, I noticed that there was something missing from the alphabet soup. There was no acronym for Asexuality. Even though there was a category for those who are unsure of what to label themselves as which is the “Questioning,” it is not truly the same as Asexuality. What happens if some people are unable to label themselves as gay or lesbian or even straight? Because they really do not have any interest in sex? Because they do not really feel any sexual attraction to people? Those people would then be considered asexual. But, why is asexuality not part of the alphabet soup?

What is asexuality? The most common known definition of the word, asexual, according to the official Asexuality website, is a person who does not experience sexual attraction. It is considered to be a sexual orientation, meaning it would also be categorized with the gay, lesbian, straight, and so on. To go further into asexuality, an asexual person is able to be attracted to people, and have meaningful relationships with them. The only difference is that an asexual person does not feel the need to have a sexual relationship, but instead focuses more on the relationship aspect: getting to really know someone, and be close to them emotionally.

So, my questions get stronger in that why is it excluded from the LGBTIQQA??? Based on my inferior experience, I have seen some occurrences online of prejudiced people who did not believe in asexuality because they did not consider it a sexual orientation. They thought it was incredulous to not have any sexual feelings toward someone one is dating in a relationship because they think, “If you like the person, would you not want to eventually have a sexual relationship with that person?” Additionally, asexual people are looked upon as if they are not even real. For instance, there are some people in the LGBT community who believe that asexuality is not even a sexual identity because of the lack of sexuality. Thus, there are prejudice and misconceptions. Prejudice due to the belief that asexual people do not experience the same oppression and discrimination as the LGBT people, therefore should not receive any particular attention. Misconception of asexuality itself, in that it is a preference, not a sexual orientation in that asexual people simply “choose” not to participate in sex which is not the case.

I can now at least understand why asexuality is never really mentioned in the alphabet soup. Even people in the LGBT community can be unaccepting towards people who are “misfits” whom in this situation are the asexual, which is very sad. This makes me wonder why they are so quick to judge people who also do not fit in society because of who they are. It seems kind of hypocritical in a way because the outcasts have their own community where they welcome “certain” kinds of outcasts, but they do not accept every outcast. In order to be part of that community, there must be specific requirements and rules that they must fulfill and follow . This relates back to the book that we read for class, “Whipping Girl”, where the author, Julia Serano, talked about being a transwoman, a person who was assigned the gender male at birth, but identifies as a female and lives as a female, and how she is not welcomed within the feminist community. The feminist community looked down upon transwomen because of their superiority of having a “real” gender as females over transwomen whose “female” gender is not real due to their original assigned gender as males. It’s ridiculous when you think about it, their reason for not accepting people who are just like them. Serano said something that I thought is very relevant, and can also be applied to the situation on asexuality. “There is no such thing as a “real” gender - there is only the gender that we experience ourselves as and the gender we perceive others to be.”

I thought this comic strip truly demonstrates what asexual people go through everyday. People not believing asexuality is a real thing, hence the pressuring questions. 

How this quote apply to asexuality is how some people in the LGBT community think that asexuality is not even a sexual orientation due to its lack of sexual attraction. Yet, who are they to state something like that when they may not even know what asexual people really go through? In reality, based on the personal accounts of asexual people from the article, "LGBT, Asexual Communities Clash Over Ace Inclusion," they have gone through a “coming out” period, and struggle with discrimination and alienation just as the LGBT people have. Despite the challenges, the LGBT community is now accepting the asexual community, realizing the true content of what it means to be asexual. Now, the two communities are finally cooperating and accepting each other which benefit them greatly for the future. In addition, there are people in the asexual community who wants to include asexuality in the LGBT acronym, but then there are some who wants to find their own independence, separate from the LGBT.

This answers my questions at the beginning, but as I am reaching toward the end of my blog, I am wondering why people feel the unconscious need to judge and hate something that does not belong within a category or restriction. Because this has happened many times throughout history: intersex, transgendered, gays, lesbians, and so much more. All of these people have experienced hatred and discrimination from society simply because they did not fit with society’s standards of what is normal. Obviously, there are many reasons why people are so hateful, like for example, it depends on religion, traditional values, their upbringing, etc. Nevertheless, it is to my belief that society are becoming more aware of these social issues, and that their mindset is changing (however, very, painstakingly slow) in that we will be able to accept people of every sexuality and gender.